If you're eating - stop reading. Finish and then come back.
Two weeks ago an old lady brought in a jar of what appeared to be a liquid to the "call to the public" portion of the city council meeting. Unfortunately, this isn't considered weird behavior for this part of the weekly program. The ending of this story just proves that the "call to the public" is a waste of time and now it has become a little dangerous.
The lady offered the jar to Mayor Leeser with instructions to give it to Representative Lily Limon. She promised to tell everyone what was in the jar at the next city council meeting. (red flag anyone?)
I noticed this and wondered what was going on. A few of you noticed this as well and had some questions. After a day or so I stopped thinking about it along with everyone else. I chocked it up to just another stupid stunt at a council meeting.
This week the old lady failed to mention the jar or its liquid contents at the "call to the public." I didn't even notice or care. However, a report I got out of city hall after the meeting cleared things up for me and proved I should have been paying better attention.
The old lady met with Mayor Leeser after the meeting and told him what was in the jar. She apparently told him that it was her own excrement and vomit that escaped her body in reaction to the demolition of the old city hall. She had thoughtfully placed the jar into the toilet while her body expressed its disapproval of the new ballpark.
The mayor had to run over to Rep. Limon's office to warn her of the contents of the jar. Limon had proudly displayed the jar of shit and vomit on her desk for days at that point.
I did not get the details on exact reactions to the news that the mayor had been handling and passing around an old lady's shit while another elected official displayed the shit as some kind of achievement trophy. I'm sure it was priceless, though.
(I can't help but think that the trophy was very appropriate for Limon's work on behalf of herself.) (you read that right)
I can only guess that nobody in this chain of shit passing has ever been to the big city where you learn early on not to trust any liquid in any kind of jar. How this lady is able to bring all of her props every week into council chambers is beyond me. Leeser is security obsessed and somehow didn't think twice about acting as a courier for this shit bomb.
You can't bring a bottle of water to your gate at the airport, but you can haul a jar full of shit up to council chambers and have your public servants pass it around with glee... I love America... I just wish El Paso was part of it sometimes.
Maybe it's time to get rid of "call to the public" altogether. The old lady's bottle of shit is a metaphor for everything else said or done during this waste of time. Hopefully this hazmat situation will inspire the mayor to finally act.